Hard Work
Yes, another picture stolen from another website.
Yes, I have been working hard despite no update.
The reason for the delay is that the search is taking longer than expected.

I'm looking for a newspaper article (hence the news theme) - but it's involving trawling through nearly every edition of a paper across a span of 40 years.

Oh well, on I go.

Attention.
The news spectacular has been postponed until further notice. We apologise for the great disappointment and trouble this will no doubt cause.

Thursday Morning in Teletubby Land.
And a very good morning to those of you joining us. We're live from the forecourt of the BP garage just off the ring road bringing you the latest news traffic, weather and Po developments throughout the day.

In sport, West Bromwich Albion lost to Manchester United in their away game. The final result was 3-1 to Manchester.

In other news, I have applied for yet more jobs and have 571 individuals in my family tree, that comprises some 83 surnames.

The snow has melted and so drivers should be on the lookout for streams of water coarsing down the gutters. This could present a hazard to pedestrians so we would advise the public to take only vital walks.

Later today we will be airing a special edition of this topical news debate magazine tv show adapted for the radio and produced on the internet where we will be uncovering yesterdays news in the form of a new, colourful, extra special, ingenious, huge, mega, extra extra large, big stylee hyperlink to a picture.

Tell your friends. Now we return you to your normal programming.

Christmas, Jobs and Family History.
I have managed to buy most of my Christmas presents already. So I should have beaten that mad rush of people with any luck. It was bad enough going to the shopping centre last Saturday!

The job search goes on. No new interviews, a couple companies have received my CV. Other than that, no news. After Christmas I shall get a job. I haven't decided what type of company, but I doubt it will be relevant and/or useful experience.

As for family history, I'm on 560-ish people. I have cracked my Mom's "brick wall", and I have traced the company we thought an ancestor had set up. I'm learning much about the family from a couple of contacts I've made. Kind of takes the pressure off me if you know what I mean.

It has just started snowing.

Awards 2005
I. Was. There.

In a magnificent town hall, surrounded by my fellow former students, surrounded themselves by proud friends and family, all facing the front of the hall where, beneath an amazing organ, sat the upper echilon of the University joined by some of our former lecturers.

Outside it was a crisp and sunny autumnal Yorkshire morning. You could see your breath but the sun soon warmed up the black gown and dark suit. Not that I or, for that matter, anybody else noticed the weather.

We had had to wait since June for this day - the weather didn't come into it.

With only the slightest twinge of nerves I stood up from where I had been sat and walked toward the stage. When I heard my name called out it was like hearing it for the first time - it didn't sound whiny or small, it sounded proud and distinguished. I had never ever thought my name would sound as good as it did that day.

Our time on stage was brief, but for me it felt like returning to an old home. Our Chancellor put us all at ease as we, one by one, walked across the stage, shook hands and departed the stage. All that preparation for such a brief moment. But what a moment.

Then, after the honorary awards and Chancellors speech, it was all over. Me and my audience - my parents and my former landlady - went off to have a lovely lunch. Expensive, but absolutely lovely.

We spoke of many things, including some of the impressive speeches we had heard. I conlcluded my business in Yorkshire and we set off on the long journey home.

I have further pictures available on my photo website. I expect that all who have been through a graduation ceremony will have felt the same as I did. There was even a strange sort of respect from the public. Oh I got stared at, but I felt nothing but pride and accomplishment. I was suprised when two passer-by's both said well done to me. Even if one person did then add "whatever all you lot in funny hats have done".

Red Dwarf, Job Interview and Stuff.
Well I've wathced everything but the episodes with commentaries switched on. Great DVD - well worth whatever I paid for it.

In fact, I have an ammusing story to tell...

Let me take you back to Monday morning. I was lying in bed (in that state where you're just waking up) when the phone rang. I answered and it was a recruitment consultant who wanted to offer me an interview. He asked me to customise my CV and send it to him. So I did that and then settled down to watch my brand new Red Dwarf DVD that had arrived that morning.

I started watching and then people wanted to intermittently talk to me about food, family history, TV and various other things. So I get all that out the way and sit back down to watch the DVD (I was on the second disc by now). Then the phone rings - it's that consultant wanting more detail. So I take just under an hour to quickly edit my CV again. Then send that off and get back to watching the DVD.

About an hour after that (this is about 17:00hrs ) I get another call from the consultant - I have an interview booked for 4pm the following day. In Reading. So, halfway through the fan-films, I rush off to buy a new suit (it costed £175). I get back, have some tea (it's now nearing 20:00hrs) and finish watching the fan films before going to bed.

Not that I slept well in bed, I was too excited. I had a plan: Get up 08:45, have hair cut at 09:15, iron shirt and set off by 10:00 to allow a good 4 hour journey time in case of bad traffic. Well I got up on time, got my hair cut, but didn't set off until 11:00.

I had a good journey - little traffic and I made good time. I got there at about 14:00, so I had some lunch, put the radio on in my car and waited for 2 hours until it was time for the interview.

The interview lasted 20 minutes.

To be fair, the interviewer tried to take me seriously. The veil slipped a couple times, but he tried - and that's the point surely? After a brief chat - that he found more awkward than me - I sat a brief test. The test was on a subject matter that was far more advanced than what I had ever had to use. You can imagine what was going through my head at this point. So we ended the interview - he didn't need to be quite so, er, fatherly (it wasn't quite being patronising because he seemed genuine).

So I returned some calls that I had received during the day about other job opportunities and tried to ring the consultant who had put me forward for this position. I think he may have been avoiding me. I left a message on his voicemail that was polite with a hint of annoyance and a speck of sarcasm.

So I started back home. It was now nearly rush hour. And now it was raining heavily. I stopped at a service station along the way for tea. I felt pretty bad by this point so I wasn't my normal friendly self. I smiled at someone who looked how I felt; they smiled back but probably thought I was a weirdo.

I finally got home at about 20:30. I caught up with a letter I had received regarding family history (which was very interesting), watched a bit of disc 3 of Red Dwarf, watched Stargate then went to bed.

What a couple of days!

Himley Hall Fireworks and Bonfire

This is where I went last night. It was absolutely brilliant. I don't know the exact number, but somewhere between 25,000 and 50,000 people went.

The theme was War of the Worlds. They had extracts of the musical arrangement and the fireworks tied in with what was happening in the story. There was even a big 'alien tripod' that housed a laser and searchlight that really added to the show.

The bonfire was pretty incredible in itself. It was a mock-up of the current Houses of Parliament, with the guy leaning against the clock tower. When the bonifre was lit, there were modest fireworks set off actually on the bonfire itself. There was even a Catherine wheel where the clock face should have been.

Aside from this, there was a big fair (I didn't go on that, though I did have bite to eat) and Beacon Radio were there to provide some entertainment to us people who got there nice and early. I have to say that most of the acts were a little on the crap side, but that didn't stop them and the presenters trying their best so it's a shame they only got one or two people involved. That said, there was this one young lad who actually had some singing talent - not suprising then that he got a couple hundred people applauding and cheering. Well done whoever you were!

At the end I expected horrendous traffic and a crush of people leaving Himley Hall. But this was not the case. Yes it was a bit crushed at times but cars seemed to be flowing fine - making slow but steady progress. I did notice that a lot of cars had lost their wing mirrors where people had been walking though.

Food and rides were pricey - but you'd expect that wouldn't you? But the entrance fee was only £6 adults, £3 concessions and I think it was orphans that went for free (some group went for free). Compare that to a smaller fireowrk display I went to on Friday that charged £5 and the fireworks only lasted 20 minutes (not allowing for the long pauses).

So, in conclusion, a fantastic night out that has most definately left me satisified. After all, I have had to wait for 4 years for this.

This is good news. Though it isn't actually released until the 7th, and it shouldn't arrive before, there is still hope.

Yeah Baby! I can do pictures! This one is from my game. That will be all I've done today. No family history (at 490 relatives) and no job hunting. Though I did still manage to be turned down for a job?!

How I did that I DON'T know!

Sister changed the channel on the digibox so stargate didn't tape. Not to worry though as it repeats on Saturday. Hardly the biggest thing happening in the world though eh?

I'm having tuna and pasta bake for tea tonight. Just as soon as I can be bothered to go into the kitchen, pout a new binbag in the bin, tidy the kitchen up and then start tea. I'll do it after Futurama.

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	7.4
Mind:	7.4
Body:	8.2
Spirit:	7.3
Friends/Family:	3.8
Love:	7.7
Finance:	7.4
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

What a difference a weekend makes.

From the above graph, I would've thought spirit would be higher. The whole thing is interesting none the less. I got the link from Shaz over on LJ.

Well I think I should mention the family history research seeing as I don't intend to do any job hunting today and I didn't do any yesterday. On Sunday I was suddenly given a mammoth task: 150 new relatives to enter into my family tree. Mum and Dad are going to get a shock when they come back from holiday. I've advanced both their efforts and filled in the trees for distant cousins (not that the latter interests Mum or Dad).

I've entered all of my Dad's tree, and am part way through Mum's. Mum's folder is a little less organised than Dad's so it takes a little longer - but I'll get there. So, I reckon I can break the 500 relatives mark by the end of the week (that's 500 relatives held in the family tree).

Waking the Dead has finished. Spooks has two episodes left. Good job the two Stargate series have started else I'd have nothing to watch. 6 days until RD VII DVD is out - but look at this.

I shall let todays emails speak for themselves (edited to avoid naming companies):

[the company] said [I'm] not a close enough academic fit, I can only presume they wanted a high 2:1 [or above], which I find very suprising.

Your application has been carefully reviewed, and I am sorry to inform you that we will not be inviting you for an interview in this instance...we hope you will not be too disappointed with this decision.

I have just spoken to the Line Manager and he has decided not to go ahead with an interview...Sorry about this, I am very surprised by his decision.

Then we have a selection of Mondays delights:

Unfortunately we do not specialise in candidates with your skills andexperience and are therefore not best placed to help you at this time.

My client is actually looking for somebody who has 2-3 years experience in real time embedded software. So to that end I will not be putting your CV forward at this stage.

And yet people keep telling me that "it doesn't matter that you have a lower-second class degree" and "it doesn't matter that you've only got a years experience". Oh and then there's that gem of advice... "go to the graduate recruitment fair as it's a chance to get your personality across and impress them".

I would like to address the latter bit of advice in more detail if I may:
I believe that I am a nice person - I'm polite, considerate and friendly. I chat to people fine. My technical knowledge is just as good as any holder of an upper-second class degree. The trouble comes when selling myself and when selling my skills.

It's not a matter of confidence - it's a matter of competence. Or rather, the lack of it. I need practice. I WANT practice. But how am I going to get to practice?

My psychotherapy book warns you against using certain phrases as you are often avoiding issues if you use them. One of these phrases is "you don't understand". I'm trying hard to see it how all the people offering advice see the problem. But I think you'll agree that it is hard to see how any employer will want me.

If you look at the evidence, employers are willing to consider my CV / application but, when it's clear I meet all their requirements they decide to raise the skills / experience they require. And you know what bugs me? They continue and continue to advertise for the job, with nobody applying to them BECAUSE NOBODY WITH THE SKILLS THEY ARE ASKING FOR WILL DO A JOB LIKE THAT FOR THAT AMOUNT OF MONEY!

I wish to scream. I'll settle for drinking lager.

All of this overshadows the one bit of good news from today; the point I'd like to end on. I've put all my Dad's side of the family history (210 people) onto the internet and got in touch with two distant cousins. So I should be able to fill out and expand the family tree. Dad will be impressed by the time he comes back off holiday. Over the next week I'll put my Mom's side of the family history up and see what I can find.

Bye everyone

I slept well on Friday night and all weekend. Last night I had trouble nodding off because THAT BLOODY BLOKE RANG AGAIN!

But I had a moment of clarity whilst lying in my bed. The invasive questions he asks would only be reasonable if he thought I had seen the jobs he allegedly sent me and suspected I had bypassed his companyand so done him out of his money. So I got in touch by email (suprisingly easily) and I may have something sorted out. If not, I have his contact details and, mainly for fun, I'm not going to let this lie.

Lots been happening out and about, I won't go into details when I can link to other people who have done the hard work for me! Besides, I'd only be repeating what I've read - so what's the point?

Doctor Who spin-off, Torchwood sounds like it could be good. Have to admit, I was hesitant at first, but I see how it can stand by itself easily. Unlike Stargate SG1 & Atlantis (new series on Wednesday) which are quite similar. As for SG1, I think this might be the last series - it's had a long run but there's only so much defeating enemy after enemy that is bearable - we'll have to wait and see though, I hope to be proved wrong.

Hang on, I think the new series of stargate has started completely without ceremony. Dad won't be pleased. Oh well, it's only the first episode. Second is tonight. Trouble is, we have 2 new characters completely unintroduced.

Anyway, in red dwarf news, there's an online comic coming out.

Venus express is ready to visit, er, venus.

Magnificent image from Mars.

Here are a few images from Saturn's Cassini orbiter

Bored now.

I'm still here. I'm still awake.

Have beaten the French in Empires game, have beaten the computer at chess. Dad has gone to work so I'm left here waiting for the rest of family to wake up. The sky outside is orange.

I am bored.

I can't sleep again.

That bloody bloke who wound me up last time rang again today. And wound me up. I have his name and company written down now, so next time he rings I can give him a taste of his own medicine. And that's what is running through my head... what I can say to him to tell him to f**k off in a polite yet unsubtle way.

So here I am, unable to sleep. So you know what I went and did? I went and drank a load of whisky out of the bottle. How piss-head am I?!

I am so fecking bored it's unbelievable. I can see why people turn to alcohol.

So to pass the time I was running through all the profiles of my friends on MSN messenger. You know what I noticed - I noticed that all my old schoolfriends whose company I still get to enjoy today was those who have a bit of a gothic / rock streak in them. Me feeling sorry for myself then feels like I've let the side down. But then me thinking with my head reminds me that image is nothing - it's whats inside that counts.

I want more to drink right now, I know I shouldn't, and I won't. I won't because my stomach hurts. It hurts like when I ate 5 of those slices of Jalepeno peppers in one go. that hurt.

I'm just incredibly bored and self doubting this morning. So please, ignore me when I say that I shouldn't rely on just one or one friends. It's not fair on them.

Dear God, look what a tit I'm making of myself. I should just delete this post and be done with it. But that wouldn't be right now would it?!

Hello,

Just enough time before the second installment of Waking the Dead to let you know of a development on the job front. I have another company that my CV has actually reached. Should they want me, and not want to raise the bar (like some), I'll let you know.

I do like the theme music from the old World in Action programme.

in WtD, it's good, but they seem to be being very retrospective: looking at the early days of the teams careers. Interesting insight, but they risk overdoing it. Lets see how it goes.

Hello, I'm in a much better mood than yesterday.

Today I've not been particularly busy again. I did a bit of DIY, listened to a couple tracks from the new Evanescence album. Well, new to me, it's been out a year! I had no idea! I've been job hunting, not much success but at least I now have a covering letter for my CV.

I'm still bored - as you can tell by the number of links.

Tomorrow I should get out and visit people. I haven't seen them for well over a week and they'll be wondering what's happened to me.

I've been reading about these RSS feeds that are getting popular. Being a geek, I'm rather ashamed of myself for not knowing about them sooner. My job searches, fansites and news sites all support it, so I think I'll try to integrate them onto one page. It could go horribly, horribly wrong.

Well, tonight I'm looking forward to Spooks at 9pm on BBC1. Looks like another good'un. I've been trying the online game, but I need more practice to do the final assignment - it's a right bitch to do! One mistake and it's start again. Which, to be fair, is the point.

****edit****
Bloody thing cut out my last paragraph. What I said was that I watch other things than the BBC. An examble is The Bill. and Elizabeth I on 4. I'm not doing the links again and you can sod off if you think I'm going to mention reviews again.

I'm rather annoyed right now. I shouldn't be. I'll explain:

Recruitment consultants ring you up and they ask in such a friendly way how the job hunt is going. What they really want to know is if it's worthwhile them bothering. The falseness winds me up. I nearly snapped at one guy this morning. But you just have to play along don't you.

Play along.

That is it for now. I feel better now I've got that off my chest.

News is flowing rather slowly at present. Not just with me either.

There's ages to go until the next major space event - a mission launched to Pluto and the Kuiper Belt in January, not that it's going to arrive for another decade. Though the seven years it took Cassini to arrive at Saturn soon flew by. Excuse the pun. I remember it launching, I remember thinking it's ages away and following it on its journey over the years.

There's no luck on the jobs front. To be honest, there doesn't seem to be many "entry level" jobs available. Tell me, how is one to get experience if nobody is prepared to offer it?

I've seen a couple of job adverts asking for graduates with a minimum of a first class degree and straight A's at A-Level (not asking for much there!!!). Then they go on to offer salary of 17k to 20k. The average is 18k-22k. I'm afraid you have to pay for that sort of quality; is my message to companies.

I discovered Yahoo! Music a few weeks ago in the wee hours of the morning when I couldn't sleep. Well today I'm listening to it again and developing my own 'radio station'. I quite like it to be honest. They have quite a good selection of music. It's paid for by a 30 second advert (for T-Mobile) every three songs.

I'm looking forward to the forthcoming release of the Red Dwarf Series VII DVD. I have it pre-ordered and am waiting patiently. I've also pre-ordered some books; some for me, some for Trace.

The rest of my time has been spent playing games. Mainly this, a lot of this and a bit of this too.

When not wasting my time on the internet, or playing games, or sleeping, or applying for jobs, I'm watching TV. There are several things I've been enjoying. There's a series called Space Race - all about The Space Race. A black comedy called Nighty Night is somthing else I'm watching. You can also watch the episodes online after they have been broadcast.

Actually, this is something I've been meaning to mention, I quite like how the BBC have started making their shows more interactive. There are show related games, interviews, clips, previews, production info as well as whole episodes online. They also are providing travel info, weather, news and more. Now this is good use of my licence fee. They are currently developing a similar kind of concept to iPod downloads. This, I feel, is the future. (by the way, the shows chosen for the links are shows I'm enjoying at the mo). I should mention that the BBC have been doing this for some time with their radio output. Listening to Radio 4 comedy is good. Oh, and BBC7.

The BBC seem to go through spells of producing good TV and swiftly follow it through with derivative nonsense that could be construed as glamorising practices which are illegal in this country.

Well, that's everything I could think of right now. More tomorrow. I think I'll do a little bit on local news.

Hello. Not a lot has changed since the last post. Still without a job - though I have applied to one more company and I intend to check those graduate training schemes to see if they're open yet.

Tracy is all set to start uni on Monday. She moves Saturday.

I have sorted my accounts for the first time in 9 months. It took nearly 6 hours! But it's done now. I have also finally managed to get the pics from Nuremberg online. It took so long because I had to transfer the pics from my phone to my laptop by infra red, from laptop to PC via floppy disk, from my PC to Dad's PC via CD-RW and then transferred to the online server. Great.

Am looking forward to having my own place - it will be nice to be able to get at my stuff as and when I want it. Have decided on rented house / flat for a while. Preferably a house if I can afford one.

That's all for now. Take care everyone.

Hello there. Well haven't I been a busy bee?!

Don't make me laugh!

I've been enjoying my time off. Taking the opportunity to relax. You'll be pleased to hear that I've applied for my first job. The rest of the good graduate training schemes start their intake in September/October and generally take until June/July before a job offer is made. I can still apply to other jobs, just not the training schemes. I'll keep an eye open.

Took an IQ test the other day - scored 126. So I went to the Mensa website and did their 'warm up' test. Scored 21 out of 30. That's 70%. I was suprised I did so well! I would be interested in others results so I can compare.

Well I'm afraid I have nothing else to say. I'm going to play a few games now. And maybe visit the loo. Oh I love this 'no commitments' environment - I haven't been this relaxed for years! Look - no eczema!

*** Bumper Update Edition ***

Entry for 20th July 2005
Well hasn't it been a good few weeks? The house move went well. Decorating went well; I got lots done and was very proud of myself for managing so well.

As some will already know, I finished living in Hudds some time ago. but I still have to visit for one last trip to work (to collect P45 and final wage slip). After that, it's goodbye for good. Well, until the ceremony in November; I passed you see - got a 2:2. I was only a few marks off a 2:1 - a bit saddening, but I'm happy if you are!

Well it was an eventful last week at work. The Friday saw my leaving do and I was so touched by the amount of people who came. I got quite a few presents, a few cards, and all of my drinks paid for. I had a wonderful evening, one of my best ever types of times.

By the end of the night there was just me and a couple others left. We got ambushed by this girl (a past 'friend' of the people left) who was obsessed with saying "you've lost so much weight". So naturally the remaining people disappeared (I don't blame them one bit!). Leaving me with this girl. Well, I finished my drink, said goodbye and went to bed.

Only one problem, I didn't have a bed to sleep in. But then, I've been wanting to sleep in the car for a while now. So off I went, I lay down in the back of the car, then that night hit me and I cried for a bit. Then I went to sleep. I had a good sleep. Woke up early, read the Dr Who book I was bought (which i think is brilliant btw) and felt tearful once more. i then had a successful, emotional day at work. Drove my friend home, said a strange goodbye and that was it.

Entry for 29th July 2005
Well, I'm back home. if I'm honest, it feels weird being back knowing i've no simple escape from this place. Don't get me wrong - my parents have made me feel so welcome and at home - it's just that I've been away so long that I don't feel part of this place any more. The sooner I find a job and a place of my own, the better. There are too many old faces, too many memories that I don't want to face. It's not that I can't deal with them, just that I'd rather not have to.

So anyway, news! I have been clearing out parents loft; it's full of my stuff. Have chucked a lot out, some is being sold on Ebay, anything that doesn't sell can go to charity or thrown away. I'm only keeping a bare minimum. That job in itself brought back a lot of memories - they weren't all good memories either.

My other job has been in a more assistive role: helping Dad put some decking up in the garden. It's not a 'flat-pack' job either - he bought the wood and is making it from scratch. My job has mainly been painting the wood; not as easy as it sounds as I spent a whole day doing most of it - JUST most of it!

On the job front, I have been keeping an eye on the market. There seem to be quite a few jobs cropping up that would be of interest to me - trouble is they are all via agencies and so how do I know who the company is? How am I supposed to know whether they are a company I want to work for? But it doesn't look as though I have much choice - I tried looking for companies but it's a pain in the rear end! But at least I have a CV written now.

Entry for 4th August 2005
I sold 3 items on Ebay - 3 of 22. I have managed to lose £1 with this venture - brilliant. Chuffing brilliant.

Now that there are no more major demands on my time, I've been getting out and about visiting family. I aim to make this a regular thing. Maybe every fortnight or something - I think every week would be a bit excessive; for the family, not for me - I wouldn't mind! Right now the time that has passed and the various feuds that have nothing to do with me seem like a chasm that needs to be filled. I want to make friends with my family.

A lot is going to depend on the next few months regarding family. The trickiest bit will be repairing bridges that I didn't burn down. I've already been rejected once when I tried to bring family together; but I guess if family don't want to know each other, that's different from me wanting to know family. I have reached the point where I feel like I'm being pulled in many directions.

I suppose all I can do is stay true to myself and to what I want. Fate, if you believe in such a thing, may make those hard decisions for me. I suppose I'm thinking too far ahead and am panicking because I can't plan. I suppose I should just concentrate on the short to medium term; for this I can plan.

See - I know what I must do. But I'm still not going to get any sleep tonight.

DONE

(again)

Yes, I've finished re-doing my project. Report just needs some photo's - I'll get them tomorrow. Done a little demo and it worked okay. Hopefully I have evidence of achievment now. Am going to include lots of datasheet bits and bats in the appendix. Also, lots of pointless circuit diagrams and software listings. The circuits are incredibly simple, but for some reason they STILL want the diagrams.

Oh well.

Still, all done. Am going home now as I'm hungry and need to do some washing.

Bye everyone

There's lots of news to tell, so I hope you are sat comfortably. Enjoy...

My landlady kept mentioning her plans and how she was busy packing. So I took it as a subtle hint and decided to pack practically everything and take it to Tracy's house this morning (me being the master of over-reaction). The remainder (minus minimal clothing and books and TV and radio) will go to my parents with me tomorrow.

I am going out for a meal with parents as a joint "their anniversary, Father's day (I thought it'd already happened) and my birthday" dinner. We're going to a chinese/cantonese restaurant.

Friday I have a hospital appointment regarding my teeth. I'm determined to have something done as it is embarassing eating in front of people. Since I have no bite, sandwich fillings (for example) tend to all come out in one go.

Well, my exam results were released yesterday. I did well. Came very close to getting 2 A's, 1 B, 1 C for my overall module grades. But I didn't. I got A, B, C, C.

While that sounds good, it is my project which has let it all down. It failed. Which I predicted - which I knew was my Achilees Heel. Apparently there wasn't enough evidence of achievement. The rest was fine. Just no evidience of achievement ergo fail.

Not to worry though; I have the opportunity to redo a bit of the project. If I demonstrate that working, and analyse the buggery out of it, and write about it all in grotesque detail, then I may just pass. I'd get a D for it if I did.

But it doesn't stop there. Oh no. Because I have what's called a referral in my project (i.e. failed but allowed a second chance) I am not eligible to go onto the extension year. So either way I'm finished, whatever happens, on 5th July. Nice.

So, with a heavy heart (and severely dented pride) I have told my friends at work that I'm leaving soon. Not telling management until I have an exact date for them (I have to hang around for results).

Will start looking into jobs around Tracy's uni today. Oh that WILL be fun.

Today's Meeting

Today was the day I was summoned to uni:

<i>"Hi Lee

I'm afraid your project is being referred.

I'm trying to give you as much notice as
possible...The referred work deadline is 5th July.

Please let me know when you will be coming. If not
today then tomorrow morning"</i>

So now I am going to work hard until 5th July to get a
pass. There's much to do but if I do it, I could pass
this year.

I had mixed feelings about the meeting. Part of me
wanted to just walk away and be done with it. But this
really is the last hurdle. It's quite a short one too
when you think about it. Doubt I'll get on to next
year now so that issue has solved itself nicely.

One last hurdle. That sounds nice.

One last hurdle. Let's give it all I have left!

untitled

lads o lads o lads,

It's been one of "those" days.

3 of 4 exams now complete. Next one on Wednesday. Will
pass both if I'm very very lucky. Not feeling lucky.
Bugger.

Am awaiting airing of star wars world premiere.

Am awaiting a nice cold guiness and comfort food.

I suddenly feel like crying.

You know, this is the last time I'll see most of these
people. If I don't graduate this year (for whatever
reason) then I won't have a chance to see them and say
goodbye properly.

Not that they'd want me there.

Aplogies for the pessimism - it's necessary to convey
the mood I'm in.

Hello,

Car has been dropped off for its service. I am off home shortly to get on with revision and preparing for my preseentation. Poster turned out quite well.

People have "noticed" how lovely my car sounds after the new exhaust was fitted.

Off I go.

untitled

Had my exhaust done today. Not the most expensive in
town but not the cheapest - BUT the work, so far,
seems superb. I believe they've sorted the cause of
the break by adjusting how the whole pipe is fitted as
well as fitting a shiny new Cat.

Website: http://www.huddersfieldexhaustcentre.co.uk/

I would definately recommend them as they are friendly
too.

In other news, the full service is booked. Have yet to
find out from Dad everything that needs doing but I
have plenty time. But the max cost is around £400 but
that could come down to £200ish if things need
adjusting rather than replacing.

So lots of money being spent. I shall have to work
hard my first few weeks after exams to pay for all of
this.

I have an ulcer a bit behind my left canine tooth.
It's annoying me.

Well, second exam has gone as well as could have been
expected.

Will spend next week revising and the rest of this
week on project poster. I have a presentation to do -
yippee!

(note the sarcasm)

Will do some relaxing too. Have to find car parts and
generally do all that stuff that I can't be bothered
with that I really should go and do now while I'm in
town.

great.

Send instant messages to your online friends http://uk.messenger.yahoo.com

How do I summarise the last few weeks (or whenever I was last here)?

• Car exhaust fell off in York. Managed to limp home but was mildly affected by inhaling the exhaust fumes.
• First exam went as well as I had hoped - whether that's enough is something else entirely
• Money, as far as I know, is okay
• Had lovely day in York by the way
• Revision has been going smoothly
• House is now sold so I need to find a place to stay for 7 weeks time
• Car's service is due - more expense as timing belt is due to be changed.
• Have been wathcing snooker where possible and I have enjoyed it.
• At some point plan on playing tennis on a Sunday.
• Car really did sound like a spitfire whilst driving with no pipe

I've probably forgotten loads but that's all I can remember as I'm hungry and I need the loo.

Bye for now

untitled

Revision Day Four:
Have started on my analogue revision now. It's hard
going and I have to say that i REALLY want to go home.
But I shall get this one question out of the way. It's
taken me an hour to write one side of A4 of bullet
points. Terrible, Terrible.

Lots of prospective students touing the place today.
Making the place look crowded.

And that's the second time I've seen that girls with
the nice skirt today.

I am the first person to hand in my dissertation out of my pathway.

Just thought I'd brag about that while I'm here. Told you I needed to be more positive when I post things.

Not a lot to report. Didn't get assignment completed last night due to running out of time. Work's departmental meeting was productive though. Thankfully, most of the complaints were about things I didn't do. But there's still room for improvement.

So today I shall finish that assignment and do some Analogue revision. I'd say that and Comms are going to be the toughest subjects. Quality Management should be okay, but the past papers are a bit questionnable - so that's something to bring up next week.

Well, I have to go in to town to get some £2 coins for the car park. I'll get lunch while I'm there so I've been wasting time. Shouldn't really, and I can think up excuses to make it all okay, but time does need to be set aside for life outside of education and work.

That wasn't the excuse by the way.

I feel bad now.

Bye for now

I was worried about an assignment I did at uni. I know I've been worried about several, but the one I am about to talk about was my Law Assignment. It was hard going - I had to search through countless law reports to try and find a relevant case to demonstrate what we had been taught occuring in real life. (All about Intellectual Property Rights).

Well, I got the mark for it today.

I got an A.

I don't quite believe it yet. I don't want to believe it as I may have mis-read the mark. Somehow. Despite many checks.

How about that then?

In other news, dissertation should get finished today. Must write up my communications lab report tonight and hand it in tomorrow morning with the diss. Revision has gone to pot these past few weeks, but once the above 2 items are out of the way, it's plain(ish) sailing for 3 weeks, then exams.

It appears that I've started to believe myself when I keep telling myself "I can do this".

See - positive mood and I can do anything. Bloody typical. Yet I'm still in two minds about doing my Masters year. Too late now though - I've filled in all the forms and have bullied myself into it.

Well, I'm back now. Still at parents house but not for long. Am up to date on my sci-fi TV programmes, and am well rested. Need to get backto Hudds ASAP really, but I don't want to. So, I'm going to have lunch and then drive back up to Tracy's house. I'll say hello and then I don't know what to do.

I want to start playing tennis so I'm looking forward to some good weather. Will also need to buy a racket and balls. But it's all good.

Revision and project report will be worked on over the next few weeks. So you can all look forward to some nice boring posts. Sorry.

Bye for now

Where do I begin? I would love to produce a nice, ordered account of the last few days. But I'll just try my best instead...

Well I got back to the West Mids on Tuesday 29th. I met friend #1 and helped him with his revision. I can't say I did much, but I think I helped. I hope I did. He very kindly bought me a Tandoori pizza. I didn't know it was a Tandoori pizza and so imagine my suprise when my eyes started watering. Still, it was nice and also very kind of him.

The next stop was my cousins house. It was good catching up with him and I hope he was taking me seriously when I said I'd have the sofa that he needs to get rid of off him. Though I'll need to rent storage for it. Then if I have storage, I can empty my parents garage and loft and my room which are all stuffed with my things. Trouble is, it's quite pricey. But I'll sort something.

Wednesday was my trip to the dentist. I think he was in a good mood because he's ofered to make an appointment with a hospital for me. There, I would talk to an orthodontist about the gap between my top and bottom teeth. I've wanted it fixed for a while - but only because eating becomes rather embarrasing if biting is required. It should already be done by now, but I got lost in the system a few years back and never chased it up.

Thursday saw me going to Stanstead Airport. It wasn't until I got there that I realised I'd been there before when I flew to Germany on a work trip. So it was quite fitting that I was flying to Germany once more. This time to Nuremberg.

Well I got to the airport nice and early. When I checked in the plane was already 30 minutes late. I then sat in a restaurant in the departure lounge eating my tea. Well the flight kept getting more and more delayed so eventually I went to sit at the gate. I got my radio out and listened to the control tower. And there I sat for at least 30 minutes listening to approach control, waiting for my plane to land. It eventually turned up and I set off about 90 mins late.

I arrived in Germany about 10 minutes after the last train to Erlangen. So I had to get a taxi. It was expensive, but not as bad as I thought it would be. I'm not allowed to tell the exact amount. I then had a brief walk (that was mostly guesswork) to the hotel. After waking up the night porter, I was in bed by 3am CET. Nice.

Well on Friday, Shaz came to meet me and we went by train to Nuremberg. She was a very good guide for the whole trip to be honest; a stressful job, but I'm very grateful for it. Anyway, we went to where Hitler built his political centre. Or, and I quite liked Shaz's way of saying this, where Hitler had places to shout at people. It really was huge, in hindsight I should have expected this. There was also lots of walking and general sight seeing which I really enjoyed.

Saturady we went to Banberg. It was a lovely market city/town. Nowt to do, but nice none the less. And there was definately a leg coming out of a wall. the leg was unlikely to be going in to the wall. And that won't make sense to many people will it?! Also went to the train/communications museum in Nuremberg. That was a very interesting day.

Sunday was spent in Erlangen. Walking through parks, sat at cafe's. I think I enjoyed this more than Shaz did so I'm sorry if I bored you, but it was a welcome change from walking and sweltering in the sun.

Monday was also a more relaxed day. Went shopping for presents and watched TV. This was also a lovely day. Well, my flight left that evening. We got there just in time. I walked pretty much straight through to the departure gate and joined the end of the que to board the plane. So there wasn't much time to spare!

Plane landed 10 minutes early and I left the plane bang on 19:50... the arrival time. Now there's standards for you!

During my trip Shaz cooked some lovely food for me and I think this deserved a mention because it wasn't necessary but muh better than eating alone in the hotel restaurant.

Talking of the restaurant, I went there once. I was the only guest in the room, there were two members of staff chatting and eating while I was. The food was well cooked, nice size portion and reasonable price for a restaurant. Unfortunately, a large lump of turkey wrapped in omellette was not very nice at all. Oh well.

Revision Day 3:
Have managed to make a good start on semester 2 digital work. Have got equations sorted in my head and I have a good amount of knowledge I can show off in the exam. I think I've covered an exam question now, but I can't be sure.

I've noticed that in the last 3 exam papers, the first 2 were the same topics and the 3rd and 4th were on a different topic. The earliest paper I could find (6 years ago) must have been before the syllabus was changed as it covers things we haven't done. So I'm not sure what topics to be covering. Still, I reckon I can learn nearly all of the past topics to a reasonable degree.

Trouble is, you'll get 10 marks (out of 25) for a question that just requires number crunching. Now at this level that can't be worth much (2 or 3 marks max). So I'm making sure I write down why I'm doing something and how that relates to everything else and some background info. That way, I can write lots for a questiopn and show that I understand why and how to do something.

Day One of Revision (Yesterday):
Now am ready for question on linear sequential systems and finite state machines

Day Two of Revision (Today):
Have confidence in answering on design for test issues and pipelining. Pretty much covered all term one digital work now. Decided not to start on term 2 stuff as that's a lot of hard work and there's not much of the day left.

Extra:
Have only been arriving at uni at 12. Must try to get in earlier. Also, why do people with colds insist on congregating around me. Furthermore, the air in here is recirculated - ergo I hope I'm not infected damn it!

Have prepared for journey to Germany - rang the hotel. I said good morning in German - to show I'd made an effort, and then asked kindly if I could speak in English. Well the lady on the other end of the phone didn't sound too impressed. If I knew more German than "Where's the train station?", "Good Morning/Day/Night", "Thanks", a formal and informal "Goodbye" and general counting words I would have happily sat and had a merry little conversation with the woman. But I don't so I didn't. I talked in my clearest English accent, not my usual 'mumbled local to somewhere in the country' accent. Maybe that was what she was peeved about. Next time I'll just mumble and see if she likes that any better!

I think I shall go home, have some tea and maybe play on the Sims, but I feel like watching TV tonight and The Bill is on at 8.

...and relax. Take a deep breath of that lovely re-circulated air and think "job's a gud'n".

smug mode.

Today I did the right thing...


I have handed in my draft project report. I have a meeting about it in 10 minutes. For the past half hour I have been experienceing butterflies, sweaty palms and an inability to sit still. Again we have a case of really good or really bad. Last time it turned out good. So we can only hope to build on that success.

Wish me luck

Well it's been a month and I've just time to say hello.

Can't remember if I said before, but I have a new mobile. It is very good, if a little short on battery life. But it's no bother as long as there's a plug socket handy.

Life, on the whole, is okay. Am healthy now at least. Not getting too stressed about exams coming up (6 weeks now) and my final project report needed finishing today, but I haven't done much. I'll do more tomorrow - honest.

This evening I'm going round a friends house to watch a film. In fact, I'm meant to be there in 35 minutes, so I'd best go and get some tea before I starve to death. May go to the chippy... I've found a good chippy by the way. Deep into Chav territory, but it's like a little oasis. A very fitting analogy if I do say so myself.

Anyway, nothing major to report. Not yet at any rate. Am likely to be participating in at least one building project over the summer, so that'll keep me busy!

Take care all.

There appears to be a particularly nasty form of the common cold going around at uni. I suffered over the weekend. Saturday I took Tracy for a drive round the lake district (I enjoyed it). I managed to go out for a meal on Sunday, but I was feeling terrible b Saturday night and it only got worse over Sunday. I stopped in bed most of the day. Monday was better, managed uni but went to bed after. Yesterday I was better still - brain had unclogged but nose kept bunging up and running. Today I am rcovering my senses of taste and smell and hearing. Glad it's finally happened - I've been feeling drained for a few weeks.

Didn't feel all that tired last night so I stayed up and read my latest book. Until after 3am. Strangely, I don't feel much more tired than when I get a good 8 hours sleep!

So, today there is lots to be done. Lets hope my porridge keeps me going till tea time.

Oh, nearly forgot my dramatic news. A tree branch fell on my car while I was driving. Scared the hell out of me. Luckily, the branch hit the corner of the windscreen. At least I think that's lucky. I can never remember where the weakest point is on a windscreen.

Right, I'm off to update myself on the world, my friends and then to do some uni work.

Take care, and keep warm

And you said I hadn't said anything profound lately...

Well today and last night I had a few of those rare moments. You know the ones - where the world makes sense, where the world seems to share a common conciousness. And now I shall explain.

Firstly, something sweet - my land lady's granddaughter wouldn't go to bed till I kissed her goodnight. Bless.

Secondly, though it hasn't happened in while, you know when you're around animals and there;s this understanding that you share. I find it happens with dogs more than cats. In fact, it's prett much just dogs now I come to thik about it.

Thirdly, This morning I drove to the car park and when I got there I just sat. For half an hour I found myself just enjoying the sun, the breeze, the blue sky (I should mention tthat I had the window wound down). That was nice.

Fourthly, something I found intriguing yesterday. There's this project into collective conciousness...
There are these little black boxes that contain an electronic random number generator. There are only two possible outcomes - a '0' or a '1'. So the theory of probability states that the number of 1's should (roughly) equal the number of 0's over any reasonable period of time. Well, the clever bit is yet to come. A scientist took one of these black boxes and sat people in front of it. He told them to concentrate on either a 1 or a 0. Remarkably, there was a sizeable shift in the number of 1's and 0's generated - they were no longer equal.
Being cynical, you could easily be forgiven for saying this could be chance. Well it was repeatable and no matter how it was tested, it still held true.

But it gets better. These black boxes (multiple boxes around the world) even registered events of global significance - Princess Diana's funeral, huge floods etc.

But it still gets better. In a twist to these results, the boxes have also shown the apparent ability to predict the future. For example, the asian tsunami, the planes hitting the world trade centre in new york generated a massive reactoon up to 4 hours before the event.

Ok, so you could argue that you could probably find any event to tie in with these shifts in the balance of 1's and 0's. But apparently they have managed to prove this is not the case. Similarly many experiments on preminition have been successfully carried out - just places are too shy to publish their results for fear of ridicule.

Unfortunately at this time I have no links to offer you so that you can look into this yourselves, but the story was carried in either the Daily Mail or Daily Express - one of them. Hopefully they haven't made this one up (like they seem prone to doing) cos then I've just wasted a good 20 minutes explaining all that.

Hello All,

I'm okay. Had a bit of a sore throat but I have a feeling that was down to dust mites. So I've hoovered everything (including mattress), polished, cleaned and so I should sleep well tonight.

Seem to be haemoraging money again. It's not like I'm spending recklessley, I'm buying only the essentials... Shopping, parts for project. Er, that's it!!! Oh yes, the hotel/flight costs for my upcoming trip to Germany have made a bit of a dent. But again - it's not like I'm flying first class and stopping in 5 star luxury with chauffeur driven limo. Though it would be nice... *daydream*

Valentines day is coming up. Not doing much for it - mainly because I don't believe in it. But I have a lovely little plan. It's got sweet value. Not much practical value, but I'm hoping she won't notice. ;-)

Uni is plodding along. Project is still making me anxious. I feel like I need to work harder - but there's nothing I can do. Today i ordered the last parts I should need. I also contacted someone about wheels for my project - I have no idea where to get them from!

Anyway, enough shop talk.

I'm ready for my tea. Am having "Spanish Chicken" tonight. I've not tried it before. Talking of not trying things before, I tried some porridge for the first time in aaaaages... possibly in decades. I liked it. It's cheaper and more filling than cereal - also seems to keep me going better. So I'm going to switch.

I really haven't a lot to say just lately. I'm still keeping apprised of world events, but I really can't be bothered commenting as it's all been said before.

In sci-fi news Red Dwarf movie doesn't look any closer - in fact it looks further away now. I say give up, shove it in a huge book with proper cast pics and we'll be happy.

Stargate is looking good just lately - also atlantis is picking up a bit.

In S.T. Enterprise, well, it's been axed hasn't it! I hope they manage to put a nice ending on it
[get ready for the tenuous link.......brace yourself......you ready?.......]
unlike farscape which got axed at the end of the first part of a two part episode! Which brings me nicely to my concluding grievance... Sky One have (to the average person) ruined the conclusion to the farscape cliffhanger. As I understand it, the new mini series is designed to finish off the series. Well, in the trailers they resolved the cliffhanger. I'll still watch it when I get the chance.

And the only reason I'm talking about these is because I've only just caught up. So I have all my info in one big burst. I got rid of my burst of political energy a few weeks back.

Do you think this post reflects the confused, tired yet motivated mind of the author?

While I remember, I would like to share this sentiment...

The world seems to like throwing jigsaws at us. Every person has a different part of a jigsaw. So team work is essential; everybody must be listened to so as to build the true picture the world is showing us.

Read into this as you will.

Hello Again.

Have had a few assignments back today - not looking too bad. It could be worse. Am still worried about this developing interpersonal skills. I know I can do it, just how the hell do you examine something like that?

I hope it's not how I think it is. Cos if it is, I'm buggered.

Anyway, lets be merry shall we.

I have bought a new phone. I can now take pictures. I shall be sending pictures to various friends and family who I know can receive pictures. Anyone else is welcome to ask.

This is quite a self-centred post today. In fact, the last few have been. I am still looking at the big picture, I just get bogged down in work and so that's all I have to write about really. All I want to do is get on with life. I'm fed up with waiting now. But that's because I'm in an unsettled mood. We'll just have to wait and see eh?

Okay, well I should be off. Work to do. Only a couple bills to pay mind you - so the future is bright.

Quite a day today. I've been wandering around the darkest depths of the Mechanical Departments and R&D sections of the uni. Also, the continuing saga of "Lee's Amazing Adventures" adds a new chapter...

I'm going to Norwich. I have to go there to look at a thesis. I've been corresponding with the UEA library and I'm all sorted for my visit. I have to book a B&B soon - I have the number for one, I just hope they have a vacancy.

On a completely different subject, I am slightly annoyed by the way certain companies refuse to reply to you just because you're a student. When I leave uni, I'm going to need their services greatly - so wouldn't it be prudent to serve me well now so that I'm biased towards them when I need them?

Also - usual gripe about music students.

I'm very excited about this trip. I do like my adventures. I've not been to East Anglia before either. So I intend to have a look at the sights while I'm there. So I'll miss my Wednesday lecture probably. But, it's only a 4hour drive - not half as bad as I expected. literally - i thought it'd be 8 hours minimum!

Have successfully dropped Wednesdays at work and promotion prospects are looking good.

I'm in a very boyant mood right now, I only hope it lasts.

Take care everyone

Hello everyone!

Well, I'm back at uni now. So far so good if you ask me. My first week back has been tiring. I'm absolutely shattered right now. But with a bit of luck I'll be able to get some time off work. As for the rest of the day, I'm going to relax. Tomorrow I'll concentrate on my project. But right now I need rest. I also need to re-tax my car today, so I have to dig out all my important documents.

Well Christmas was lovely - I relaxed and had a generally good time. Can't ask for much more can you? Saw family again and I think they all lked their presents. Though I didn't get Dad much or Tracy much, but Dad appreciated what I got him. There's no excuse for what I got Trace. Still, I've got Valentines day and birthday and anniversary to pay for as well. So I better put my savings to good use - don't you think?

I received some lovely things for Christmas, and I'm grateful to each and every person that thought to go out and get me something. It was greatly appreciated. Thank you.

One of my presents was The Sims 2. My god that's a big game! I've had to buy more RAM, a new hard drive and a memory stick so I can install the drivers onto my computer to allow the graphics card to work appropriately.

During this process I went and bought the wrong type of RAM. So I'm flogging it on Ebay where I bought the rest from. So hopefully, the replacement RAM will pay for itself.

I'm still seriously thinking about moving to New Zealand. And oddly, as soon as I mentioned it, there were all these TV programmes about the place. Weird that - but it happens quite often. Not just to me though - it happened to someone I know recently. It's a strange old world.

Talking of worlds, there's a lot going on in space at the mo. There's a probe to a comet which will blast a hole into it and see what's inside. There's the Huygens probe which will soon descend into the murky depths of Titan's atmosphere. The gamma ray observatory is up and running. We also have the space shuttle return to flight preperations well under way. The Martian winter is coming to an end, so the NASA rovers will be up and about again soon. Plus the ESA orbiter Mars Express is, at some point, going to deploy it's radar. They've been having trouble because it might open and whack the long range communications antenna.

Back on earth, we have the aftermath of that earthquake. 2 million thrown into poverty? Countless dead and lost. Terrible. My only hope is that all these donations make there way to where they're meant to go. Though in reality (probably) a chunk of it will get squandered, most of it will never turn up, and what's left will be spent naiivly. I hope this doesn't happen, but I fear it is likely.

Also there are more effects of that earthquake. As if to underline just how severe it was, the length of the day is now 2 microseconds shorter. Now that is quite a difference from just one event!

Have you ever wondered what an earthquake looks like? I mean - right at the fault line. I know what it looks like in theory, but what about reality?

I kept getting some horrendous dreams after the earthquake. I dreamt I was there. I wasn't in my body, I was in the body of a survivor, and I went through what they went through. Or at least my minds approximation of what they went through.

Anyway, I should be off. I hope that's updated everyting. Take care everyone - especialy in this spell of rough weather we're having.