Ok, it's been a long time, and a lot has happened.

Christmas went well, got a few pressies and I liked them all. New year was good, spent time with mates and gf, saw films, went for walks, dislocated a few joints, so all in all a good couple of weeks.

January was quite boring really. Visited Trace towards the end of Jan cos I got some time off. Not many work trips in JAn - 2 trips to Germany though, quite enjoyed it. I actually understood most of what was being said since the trip was caried out almost entirely in english. So i felt i had a much larger role to play.

Unlike February. Which started with a work trip to france for the week. On our way home we were told another french mill needed us. So we went there. Stopped there till nearly 1am, then I was off to the airport for midday saturday. picked up some illness so im a bit dizzy, a bit bunged up, bit achy, but otherwise ok.

1st February was my Nan's birthday. Unfortunately, she died in October 2001, but I love her so much and would like the rest of the world to know that. Also had a really emotional dream about her this morning and I woke up crying at about 4am.

Haven't been keeping in touch with people as well as I could be. There are certain people who I used to be friends with, but they don't bother talking to me anymore. Yes, it was my fault to start with, but I've tried to correct this but all I get is:
1) ignored
2) fobbed off
3) chatted to in an over-friendly, way-too-generous way
at least i can say one thing... I know who my friends are.

Have a new addition to my website (first in a long time). Again about a block of flats and lights (related?!) The complex in which I live has corridor lighting on a timer activated by a switch at the front door. So, when someone comes in, they switch the light on. The corridors stay lit for 5 minutes or so.

Now, I leave work at random times. Anywhere between 4 and 7 usually though. and whenever I return, the lights are already on. So, I propose that there is someone either spying on me or living in my flat while i'm not there and they have an early warning system in place.

Hjmmm, thinking about it, that is quite pathetic. I mean, thats a standard time for people to get back from work. It could be anyone. Oh well.

How about people staring at me? That's still going on even though I've bought a new jacket! Its a furry thing. I think a womans coat but, to quote Tracy, "a woman wouldn't be seen dead in one of them". I think she thinks it's hideous. But it's warm - and that all i care about.

Am feeling a bit shaken from another blog i've read. it's someone who plans to kill themself on 3rd March 2004. Reading it, you come away with the impression that all the upset could be avoided if the person would seek help. But they keep it bottled up. I'm not sure they'll go through with it, I hope they dont cos there seems little need. They admit they have good days. so maybe anti-depressants would help. maybe there is an underlying physical condition affecting this person. the link is here for the more morbid reader...http://behindanonymity.blogspot.com